Sunbathing by the pool. Every now and then a fly would buzz by and the dog would bark happily, playing on the lawn with its rubber toys. Not a worry in the world! She’s long and well built. Blond hair, big tits, slim, good legs. She must be around 30.


What use is the school? It bores me to death. Instead, I spend most of my time fishing. There seems to be very little going on here, on this pond. But that’s not true! Sometimes Jiri and Milos come by and we smoke a cigarette. Sometimes I take a book with me and I read. I read ‘The Old Man and the Sea’ the other day. I liked it. It’s about an old man who, after 80 days of not catching anything, manages to catch the biggest and the most beautiful fish ever. Actually, the old man and his little boat became part of the fish for a while. No, the fish did not eat them! They float together out in the open sea and the old man talks to the fish and lets him do whatever he wants. He does not want to kill him but he has to, in the end. He was tired and hungry. The fish was. But the old man as well. And then the sharks came and ate the whole fish. I don’t like sharks.


The sun pounced on every pore of her shiny skin. She was tired although it was only around noon. The drinking last night and the sex in the morning were taking their toll. Her body ached. She spread her suntan cream with slow motions, almost caressing herself. She thought about her fingernails… they needed to be polished again… And the stuffed “whatever” they ate last night. She had no idea what it was – she found no words for it in her language. But it tasted good. Her English was rather poor and only just about covered the basics. Picking up the right word for the dish and finding a correspondent in her language was too much of an enterprise. Whatever… Her buttocks hurt a bit and on her left shoulder she found a bite mark.


I don’t only fish all day. I do other things as well. For example, I cook whatever I manage to catch. My grandmother taught me how. I am usually happy with the results. I can make a good soup if I want. Or a fish pie. Or I can grill it. Grilled I like it best, actually. The rest of the time I spend on the computer. I don’t play games. Game playing is for sissies. I only browse and read whatever I find interesting. That’s why I don’t need to go to school any longer. If I need anything I just find it on the Internet. Like the other day, I wanted to know how many kinds of deep sea fish are there. There are many. And some of them are scary to look at. Can you imagine they barely see the light of day down there? We don’t have deep sea fish here. We don’t even have a sea here. There is just this pond at the end of the village.


Sweat drops. Tiny, transparent drops glinting for a fraction of a second and then slowly sliding away. I like the heat. I like to hear the heart thumping and the blood waving my body. Don’t think about love! Don’t love! Just fuck! He’s nice, I think. Does not talk much to me but tries to make it comfortable. He doesn’t have to, of course. That’s why I am here. So that he wouldn’t bother. I am here when he wants me, how he wants me. I just have to do it. No questions asked. It isn’t easy what I do, I know. I might as well be dead. Not really… Perhaps… Lucky, that’s what I am! And now I even have a vacation. A whole week. I won’t make much money like this but at least I’ll have a break. Somehow… A break…


I don’t like fighting. I got punished for it a couple of times and then I decided I don’t want to fight with anyone anymore. Not at school, anyway. So what if they talk? Let them talk. They never come here. They don’t have the guts. Except for Jiri and Milos. They are OK. They are my friends. Sometimes we talk about what we are going to do when we get out of this place. They think they will find work in Austria. Just across the border, in the Shopping Mall. But I don’t want that. I want to go to America. Why not?


In the evening she went for a walk. She said she’d be back soon. She walked past houses and taverns and took photos of the sunset. She smiled at tourists and smiled even more whenever she heard them speak her language. But never talked to them. She sat by the sea and smoked cigarettes. It’s rather far away from home. I never been so far. It’s beautiful here. And warm. I’d never want to leave from here again. If it only were that simple! Whatever happened with second chances? I’ll never be on the list for that, will I? That’s it! That’s the whole of it!


When she got back, he told her he’s got something for her. A present.

“I found them in the storage room downstairs. I think they belonged to my grandfather. I have no use for them. You have them!” In small boxes, colorful things, small jewels stole her eyes. Tiny blue feathers, yellow threads and shiny hooks. “For your son! He likes fishing, doesn’t he?”


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